Iron Man 2
written by Justin Theroux

Howard Stark: Tony, you're too young to understand this, right now, so I thought I'd put it on film for you. I built this for you and, someday, you'll realize that it represents more than just people's inventions. It represents my life's work. This is the key to the future. I'm limited by the technology of my time, but, one day, you'll figure this out, and when you do, you'll change the world. What is, and always will be, my greatest you.

[Hammer is demonstrating various weapons for Colonel Rhodes (Don Cheadle) and Major Allen (Tim Guinee).]
Justin Hammer: Well, you're talking to the right guy. Claridge Hi-Tec, semi-automatic, 9-millimeter pistol. Too downtown? I agree. M24 shotgun, pump action. Five-round magazine. You know what? You're not a hunter. What am I talking about? I'm getting rid of it. This is the FN-2000 from Belgium. They do make something better than waffles. It's beautiful, but I can tell this isn't disco enough for you, so I'm gonna put it right here. You're looking at a Milkor 40-millimeter grenade launcher. Tear gas, smoke. Hippie control. You're tough. Let me tell you something. Size does matter. Don't let anyone tell you different. This is an M134 7.62 Minigun. Six individual barrels. The torso taker, powder maker. Our boys in uniform call it Uncle Gazpacho, or Puff the Magic Dragon. Okay. These are the Cubans, baby. This is the Cohibas, the Montecristos. This is a kinetic-kill, side-winder vehicle with a secondary cyclotrimethylenetrinitramine RDX burst. It's capable of busting a bunker under the bunker you just busted. If it were any smarter, it'd write a book, a book that would make Ulysses look like it was written in crayon. It would read it to you. This is my Eiffel Tower. This is my Rachmaninoff's Third. My Pieta. It's completely elegant, it's bafflingly beautiful, and it's capable of reducing the population of any standing structure to zero. I call it "The Ex-Wife." This is the best I've got. Are we gonna do this? Give me something here. You're like a sphinx. I can't read you.

Kudos and many thanks to Jason for these monologues, it is very much appreciated.

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