written by Paul Thomas Anderson
(Dirk is sitting in a jean costume, script in front of him for the new film, working on the lines. He's cleaned up a bit, hair slicked back. He looks in the mirror)
Dirk: I've been around this block twice looking for something . . . a clue. I've been looking for clues and something led me back here . . . yeah . . . so here I am. Coulda been me who was at Ringo's place when the shit went down......Hey...I know how it is...'cause I been there...... we've all done bad things....We all have those guilty feelings in our hearts...you wanna take your brain out of your head and wash it and scrub it and make it clean...well no. But I'm gonna help you settle this...First we're gonna check for holes, see what we can find...then we're gonna get nice and wet...so you're gonna spread your legs...(beat) That's good...so you know me, you know my reputation? Thirteen inches is a tough load, I don't treat you gently. That's right: I'm Brock Landers. So I'm gonna be nice and I'm gonna ask you one more time......Where the fuck is Ringo?
(Dirk stands up, unzips his pants and lets his penis hang out. He looks at the reflection of it in the mirror)
Dirk: I'm a star, I'm a star, I'm a star. I'm a star. I'm a star, I'm a big bright shining star.
(He puts it back in his pants, does a karate kick towards his reflection, bows, and walks out of the room, closing the door behind him. The film ends)
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