Half Baked
written by Dave Chappelle & Neal Brennan

Thurgood Jenkins: Hey, what’s up everybody? I’m Thurgood Jenkins. You know, it’s funny but I can trace every path in my life, to one childhood memory. My last clear memory really. You see, it was the summer before my 9th grade year. It was me, Kenny, Brian, Scarface and of course, lovable old’ James. Oh wait hold on wait a minute, old’ James wasn’t there. Hell, I don’t even know anybody named old’ James, shoot. I don’t remember graduating or my first sexual experience, I don’t remember that either. But man, I will never ever forget the first time I smoked that sweet sweet Sheeba. You know, I’ve heard some people say they don’t get high the first time they smoke. Not me, oh, not us, we was really really high. We was toe up! We look at that day like we met the 5th member of our crew, Marijuana! Oh lord, we was hooked!

Kudos and much thanks go to Bryce for this monologue, it is very much appreciated.

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